"I'm not impressed."
Those were the words from an influential business leader a few months into my tenure in a big corporate role. "Not impressed!" Let me be clear, I was also far from impressed by him—but that's beside the point. His dismissive remark hit me hard, leaving me feeling diminished and worthless. Beyond the personal sting, this episode now throws me into a deeper reflection about a pervasive issue—not just in boardrooms but across America.
The aftermath back then? I became reticent in meetings, my once confident voice reduced to a whisper of doubt. The fear of tripping over my words, of saying something dumb, became a constant. The notion of voicing an opinion seemed dangerous; a surefire way to invite criticism or worse. So, I shrank into the background. His words did more than undermine my confidence. They stripped me of any sense of security.
Ever felt muzzled like that? It's not just a personal plight; it's a symptom of a larger epidemic in our cutthroat business world and, frankly, in America today. I think it's part of our ever-expanding polarization, where differing voices aren't just ignored but actively suppressed.
Psychologists call this phenomenon psychological safety, and it's the center of today's post. To be clear: I'm not a fan of the term; it's too stilted, too sanitized for the messy reality it represents. But we'll roll with it for now.
What’s 'Psychological Safety'?
Stripped of jargon, it's the liberty to speak your mind and make mistakes without being crucified. For teams, psychological safety is a shared belief that you can take risks and show vulnerability without being seen as dumb, incompetent, negative or disruptive. Its absence breeds a culture of fear—fear of being shot down, fear of screwing up. It's not just about discomfort. Lack of psychological safety stifles creativity, dependability, and our mental peace.
Navigating this silence wasn't only a professional challenge for me; it was a personal battle against self-doubt. Finding allies who shared my values, engaging in honest conversations—these are what helped me find my voice again. I had to learn that my worth, my 'safety', wasn't tied to the approval of a single, wayward executive. And that's never easy when we're feeling bullied.
Speak-up Culture, Maybe?
I don't know if Speak-up Culture is a better term for it, but I'm trying to get away from the triggering effect of words like "psychology" and "safe." It doesn't matter. No matter what we call it, there's a stark difference to environments where speaking openly and freely thrives. Ideas can flow uninhibited, mistakes become learning opportunities, and employees feel valued and heard. This atmosphere fosters better teamwork, connecting people to the meaning and impact of their work.
But how do we cultivate this magic at work? It starts with leadership. Leaders, it's on you to model openness and curiosity; to cherish your teams' ideas; to prop them up and demonstrate genuine care. It's about fostering an environment where respect is paramount and every voice matters. And then it's up to all of us to hold our leaders accountable.
When we don't, we're submitting to self-silence.
Beyond the Boardroom.
Psychological safety has anchored itself in the business of corporate teaming. But the issue transcends cubicles. The same trend of silencing we see in our workplaces is mirrored in our national discourse. It's a troubling reflection of a decline in open, respectful conversation—a phenomenon that's fueling division and eroding the bedrock of our democracy. When we don't feel safe, we witness the retreat into echo chambers. Differing views aren't just disregarded, they're vilified. The loudest voices win, and god forbid that we should disagree with them!
This is a problem. When people are afraid to speak their minds, when diverse opinions are met with hostility rather than curiosity, we lose more than just individual contributions; we lose the essence of what makes a society robust and vibrant. It's not about fostering agreement, but about maintaining spaces where divergent ideas can be debated healthily.
It's in these spaces—in work, in life—where innovation lives, where understanding deepens, and where solutions to complex problems are born.
A Path Forward.
I hope this provocation starts something bigger. Term aside, the concept of psychological safety (or lack thereof) looms over present times. It's not just about speaking up in meetings or getting cozy with being wrong sometimes. It's about intentionally chipping away at this mountain of silence we've built around ourselves. Not only at our desks, but out in the big, wide world.
So, I'm not going to shrink back when someone's "not impressed" with me. And I hope you won't either. In the next group meeting, let's throw out some ideas, no matter how wacky they might seem. Then, let's take this spirit outside. Let's challenge the false comfort of our echo chambers. Have a chat with someone from the 'other side' of whatever fence you're on, and listen—really listen.
I think we can do more than break the silence. We can shatter it. My commitment is about building bridges where there are walls. About creating cultures that make room for all voices, not just the loudest ones.
This is how we create quality conversations that lead to quality outcomes.
How can we be the ones who start those conversations?
With warmth, respect, and gratitude.
Oof this brought me back to rooms where I've felt intimidated, unseen, unheard -- especially earlier in my career, but even now as a leader/manager. Those environments are far too pervasive, and I'm so grateful for this post (and also a challenge to the term "psychological safety"...there has to be something better?). Dismissal, whether conscious or unconscious, is truly the best way to undermine talented people and fresh perspective/innovation.
Love this one so much! I agree ENTIRELY about the importance of psychological safety in the workplace (especially in creative fields!), but also at home. We need to be creating environments where people around us feel supported to say what they think! Also agree with you on the idea of this needing a new name- it sounds so clinical. Let's come up with one!!